Sunday, March 14, 2010

Where's the Cork?

Remember when.....

Those two words promise one of three reactions. Ahhhs of found remembrance, Ugghhs of things best left forgotten, or quiet nods of confirmation.

In this case I think it will be quiet nods.

Remember when wine bottles had honest to goodness corks in them?

I thought a corked bottle neck was one think I count on staying the same throughout my life. So I was shocked when, after peeling the foil seal from a bottle of White Zinfandel, I found myself presented with an atrocious off-white polymer impostor plugging the neck of the bottle.

After taking a moment to collect myself I decided to be open minded. There was the benefit of not having to worry about pieces of shredded cork floating in the wine - but still - polymer? dirty white? Couldn't the bottle stopper at least have been tan in color?

Did this mean I was going to have to purchase a polymer screw instead of a cork screw?

As it turned out the cork screw worked fine but...

When I tried to return the polymer plug to the neck of the bottle I found the man made product was far less pliable than a saturated cork. My fingertips flattened and turned a blueish pink from the effort of trying to coerce the hideous looking cylinder back into place. My face soon turned the same color as my fingertips and I drew blood from my bottom lip. Never mind plugging the bottle back up. I now needed more wine to disinfect the bite I had inflicted on myself.

Some things were never meant to be tampered with. Nix the polymer. Give me a good old fashioned cork.

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