Checking the Peepers

I had my two year eye exam two years late today.

I made the appointment after realizing that my triceps and deltoids were gaining mass from holding books at arm's length in order to get the words to come into focus.

Since it had been four years since my last checkup, the eye doctor ran the full barrage of tests - which necessitated dilating my pupils.

After putting the drops in my eyes, the doctor informed me that my eyes would be very sensitive to light for a few hours and asked if I had brought sun glasses with me. It seemed to me that he should have asked that question BEFORE administering the medication that would cause my pupils to expand to the size of intergalactic worm holes.

Before I could point out the lapse in prioritization, I was ushered off to the waiting room where I would pass the time while my eyes went through their metamorphosis. The nurse left me with the warning that my vision would become blurry.

I don't know about you, but I pass the time in waiting rooms by reading. I made it through two dozen sentences before the words on the page melted into ink spots.

Next time I'll remember sun glasses AND an Ipod.