Hidden World

It was closing in on seventy degrees here today, making thoughts of the recent snow storm fade into history.

I headed down to the boardwalk, parked myself on a bench, and prepared to lose myself in a book.

The insistent surge of the ocean soon had me gazing out toward the water. I was in a near trance when I noticed something amiss. Handrails for stairs - but no stairs.

During a recent beach reclamation project, thousands of tons of sand were shaped into man-made dunes to protect the boardwalk from storm surges. A five foot high by thirty foot wide wall of sand was pushed hard up against the boardwalk. Apparently it was decided just to bury the existing stairs rather than dismantle them.

It made sense. The stairs were no longer needed. The five foot drop from boardwalk to beach was changed to a gradually descending path through the massive sand dune.

But - the handrails for the stairs were left in place. Waist height at the boardwalk, the weathered boards now slope downward only a short distance before disappearing into the sand. A seeming invitation into a hidden world.

Tiger Wii

Motivated Mom (my wife) and I make use of our Wii game console on a fairly regular basis. For months we have challenged one another in bowling and golf, occasionally experimenting with one of the other sports.

We recently decided it was time to expand our horizons in golf, so Motivated Mom picked up Tiger Woods Golf for Wii.

The minute the options popped up on the screen I could see Tiger Wii was going to be a challenge. Not because the first hole looked intimidating but because the menu indicated we were going to have to select a golf persona, a course, a level of difficulty... the list went on.

We finally made it to Tiger's tutorial screen. Okay, no big deal, I was a semi Wii Pro.

I took my first swing and a message appeared on the television screen telling me I could do better.

Thirty swings later I was still being told I could do better. Apparently Tiger's coaching team didn't realize I was an accomplished Wii golfer.

Since there was no way to interact with the coaching staff, I turned Tiger Wii off. Let the coaches bemoan having lost their chance to be associated with me when they later see my name appear in the Golfing Hall of Fame.

Abominable Fangs

Remember the Christmas animation classic Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer - the one that begins with a singing snowman who sounds remarkably like Burl Ives?
Remember the abominable snow monster in that show - the over sized white shaggy ape with the wicked set of teeth? Well, abominable (or mumbles as Yukon Cornelius later called him) lost his fangs in my front yard yesterday.

At least it sure looks that way.

My car had been backed far enough up the driveway that the rear bumper was hanging over the mound of shoveled snow. When the icicles that had been hanging from the bumper softened enough to fall, they dropped point first into the snow mound. And there they stand, in a variety of lengths, like a lost set of vicious looking choppers.

Those things could have killed somebody if they had fallen from above.

Come to think of it, there are some very similar icicles hanging from roof eaves all around. Let a pair of them fall at an inopportune time and they could imbed themselves in an unfortunate person's head. The poor person would end up looking like Uncle Martin from the television show My Favorite Martian.

More fuel for my argument that temperatures were never meant to drop below fifty degrees.

Old Vs. New

I have been paying for my sins recently.

There have been a plethora of computer issues in our home recently and I have spent more than my fair share of time on the phone with technical support people whose dialects make understanding of tech-speak all the more difficult.

Today I was getting Queen B's computer rigged up for wireless internet communication.

I think Queen B is just a little intimidated by the idea of computer data beaming past her head while she sits at her keyboard. - I have to give her credit for her willingness to learn though - not all seventy-eight year old's go through withdraw if they can't e-mail daily.

With the help of a techno-geek on the other end of the phone line, we got Queen B streaming.

Queen B signed onto her e-mail account. For some reason the screen displays differently than it did when Queen B was using a DSL connection (don't ask me what DSL means - I have no idea - I only know it's different than wireless).

Queen B was a little put off the screen change and set about e-mailing with a certain trepidation.

Relax, I said, The worst that can happen is you'll turn off the power to all of Sussex County.

I'm sure she felt much better after that.

Language Lass B-Day

Up until now March 4th has always stuck in my mind because of the play on words that first reached my ears in grade school.

What do you do on March 4th? You march forth.

Now March 4th has far more significance. It's Language Lass's birthday.

(For those of you who may be new readers Language Lass is engaged to our son - College Dude).

If I had been thinking ahead, I would have run to the library and learned how to write Happy Birthday in four different languages. I'm thinking that would have really impressed Language Lass.

Maybe startled is a better word. Language Lass would have been startled there was so much intelligence behind my vacant stares.

Huh? What? Where was I?

Oh yes, getting ready to march forth to celebrate Language Lass's birthday.

Happy Birthday Language Lass

Shovelcise

I was engaged in my least favorite activity today - shoveling snow.

An hour into the drudgery, I realized I had stumbled on the next workout craze - Shovelcise.

Okay everyone, before we start remember to lift with your knees, not your back. Ready? Grab your shovels and..

Lunge - and - step. Push - and - slide. Lift - and - throw.

Good. That's it. Again. A little faster this time.

Lunge - and - step. Push - and - slide. Lift - and - throw.

Excellent, remember to keep the knees bent and your eyes straight ahead. This time we're going to throw to the right. You can do this. Here we go.

Lunge - and - step. Push - and - slide. Lift - and - throw to the right.

Now we're going to throw to the left. Ready.

Unh, unh, uh. I see you reaching for the starter rope on the snow blower. None of that. This is all about building stamina. Get that shovel back in your hands. Here we go.

Lunge - and....

In Like a Lion

March is coming in like a lion.

The weather service is doing a terrific job of talking up the perfect storm.

It seems snow is converging on us from two fronts and our area is to get up to eight inches of the white stuff.

You need to understand that with significant snow a rarity in lower Delaware, the potential impact of eight inches would be like Vermont getting eight feet of snow.

So of course everyone is racing to the grocery store.

I could never figure that knee jerk reaction out. Does anyone really need twelve loaves of bread and ten gallons of milk while waiting for the snowplows to clear the roads?

Of course not. The requirements are a case of beer, a bottle of hard stuff, and jumbo container of nuts - which is why I headed for the liquor store.